Lightness of Being…

"Are you sure this is going to work?" Sarah's eyes were wide.

"Of course! this is an ageless remedy, my darling. This is the secret behind Majnoon's craze for Laila, the potion that allowed women to be rulers, the essence of love extracted and bottled for your own heart…no one can resist it" the herbal lady  assured her loftily looking at Sarah with her disturbingly large cross-eyed face.

Sarah sniffed the concoction suspiciously. She eyed the thick blossomed, colorfully attired, heavily made up woman in front of her. Does she really know what she is talking about?

A secret almost thrilling thought shot past her: What if it kills him?

She banished that thought immediately, what is wrong with her? She honestly worried about her own sanity nowadays.

She couldn't believe she was actually standing in the dark over furnished room, filled with exotic scents of herbs, incense, dusty bottles and half used candles. When her neighbor meaningfully told her about the infamous love potion she almost laughed out loud. This was really low, even for her.

But what was there to lose? She had long dead years full of sorrowful, loveless, monotonous moments trailing her; certainly nothing could be worse.

-

He came home relatively early that night, in an even fouler mood than usual. He nodded at Sarah, who was standing around nervously clattering the pots and pans in the kitchen. The children were already in their rooms getting ready for bed.

"Will you have some dinner?" Her heart was hammering so loud, she had to fight to keep her voice nonchalant.

He grunted and walked away.

At first she only put two tablespoons as directed, but the little bottle was too alluring. She decided what the heck, for Waleed's blackened soul she certainly needed a lot more than that; and dumped the whole bottle into the curry she was carefully stewing. The potion was tasteless and it mingled innocently with the spices and pieces of chicken floating around the bowl.

He barely looked up from the Television when she brought him his dinner tray.

She stood around nervously and decided to retreat into their bedroom before she blew it.

-

The room was dim lit, with faint music playing in the background. She slipped on her lingerie, puffed some powder, and accentuated the contours of her face with subtle makeup. She carefully applied lotion to her body with a rose scented cream and lay down on the freshly changed satin sheets. Her hair cascaded over the pillow and created a halo against her gorgeous face.

She closed her eyes and waited, scarcely breathing.

-

His derisive laughter shot her eyes open.

"What's all this? You really  want to be screwed huh?"

Damn cross-eyed lady! What happened to the love portion?!

Two strides and he was immediately on top of her; roughly tearing through her lingerie while pulling his pants.

She fought him.  "What the hell are you doing?"

"Giving you what you have been begging for"

She started to kick and scratch him. A soundless scream caught in her throat. Out of habit, she learned to keep her voice down; her children should not be exposed to this madness.

He roughly shoved her as he tried to tug off his pants.

Lines and boundaries were being crossed. This was a new frontier and Sarah was suddenly enraged.

"Leave me alone you Jerk, or I swear to God I will butcher you!" She hissed.

"What?" he paused amused at her sudden outburst “isn't this what you have been asking for?"

"No! NO!" She sobbed.

He eased himself off of her and stood to take off his pants. Suddenly his eyes rolled backwards and he took a step to balance himself.

"Waleed?" Sarah momentarily forgot herself.

"WALEED!" She screamed as he slumped down unconscious the word "damn" barely out of his mouth.

-

That night in the hospital was the longest she had ever spent. The doctors were completely stumped at what caused his sudden fainting fit. He had a hard time staying awake.

Sarah was not stupid enough to offer anything. She stayed by his side horrified at what she had done, and praying for his safety. How could she be so stupid? What was she thinking? The revulsion she felt for herself knew no bounds.

They put him on IV and monitored him throughout the night. He was in and out of consciousness all night long and finally woke up the next morning grouchier and meaner than ever. He asked to be discharged, but the doctors were against it.

"We still don't know what's wrong, we are currently processing your blood work and keeping an eye on your fluid levels…" the young doctor was rudely interrupted by Waleed's cursing.

"Do what you gotta do, I am out of here."

He walked out without as much as a glance in Sarah's direction.

-

His father was such a nice man. He was a little short, pudgy, jovial human being who was so full of life, ideas and energy.

How could that devil's spawn be related to this man?

Sarah requested this meeting urgently. She was loathed to approach her benefactor for even more favors, but she had to finally draw the line.

"I don't want him near me or the children anymore, you know your son, and you know what he is doing to me. I have kept quiet for too long but Khalas. I can't do it anymore."

He looked at her kindly and nodded.

"What is it exactly that you want?"

"I want to separate from him. I still want to maintain our household and my children to live in the manner that they are accustomed to. I don't want anything for myself, except enough to pay the bills and run my household. I want him to have no part in our lives, and if he wishes to see his children to go to their grandmas house on pre-arranged days."

-

"YOU CAN’T KICK ME OUT!  THIS IS MY HOUSE!" He yelled at her.

"Yes I can. And actually this is your father's house" her calmness was lethal.

She had packed his bags and dragged them across to the lawn. He didn't even need to come inside anymore.

"You talked to him? You BITCH"

"Yes, I did, and please do not call me names on my property…g-e-t o-u-t" she seethed.

"Why don't you make me?" he laughed dangerously.

She shrugged indifferently "The cops are on their way."

"I will kill you! You can't get away with this" he growled.

"I would like to see you try" She smirked.

-

She had never received more phone calls, flowers,and mushy cards from him. She laughed at the memories of their courtship his desperate actions evoked.

She actually was laughing for the first time. A laughter leaden with bitterness, mingled with relief, bordering on hysteria; but it was laughter nonetheless.

The whole air in their house had cleared up considerably. Her little Suhaila, only daughter, actually invited some friends over for a movie for the first time ever.

Her oldest son had thrown a fit, but she told him to feel free to join his dad if he wanted, and even started to help him pack. The seriousness of her offer, made him subside considerably, and instead he just grumbled a little and sulked. No, he really would prefer to continue living with her.

Her baby son was still happily indifferent to everything.

Sarah signed up for swimming lessons, a Beauty school course, opened her own account and cut back a little of their daily expenses to start saving for her-self. She got together with friends and had a grand time laughing over his overly sentimental notes on how much he misses her; how his eyes have opened now; and how he was on his knees begging, just begging her for a second chance.

I gave him ten years worth of chances, that brute.

-

Murphy's Law had long dictated that things were only going to get worse for Waleed.

About a month after he was ceremoniously kicked out, news about his father's death reached him. He was lying on his friend's couch, wallowing in misery wearing nothing but his boxer shorts.

It took him a moment to fathom what happened "Who died?" He asked his brother stupidly.

"Man! Dad, your father?" His brother was irritated by Waleed's sloppiness. "Can you put on some clothes; we have a lot to do" His whole demeanor was businesslike.

-

The funeral had one of the largest processions ever in the little island's long history.  Everyone knew and greatly respected Mr. Al-Hafidh. He seemed to have done every single person, a favor at some point in their lives. People remembered his generosity, his diligence, and shook their heads in sorrow. None of his many children took after him.

The lawyers got quickly involved to dispense his will.

The island rejoiced for a whole 1/3 of his wealth was spread out among the poor.

His children were shocked at the manner in which he divided up the rest.

"I can't believe that old bastard, he is probably lying down with his middle finger pointing directly at us!" Waleed furiously spat.

-

Sarah could hardly believe her bounty. Her house was bequeathed to her, as well as three newly renovated, fully rented apartment buildings. She had about 45 tenants, enough to guarantee her a staggering monthly income.

In his will, the father indicated his foremost concern was his own grandchildren's welfare (progeny was the actual word he used); and knowing Waleed's irresponsible streak, he intuited Sarah would not let him down.

Waleed was given a flourishing trucking business that he had to run. His success or failure would depend on his own efforts. Waleed was naturally livid.

The rest of the wealth was divided just as wisely; but it wasn't wisdom that his children really cared about.

The old man died without a single supplication from any of his twenty odd children.

Sarah woke up in the middle of the night and earnestly prayed for the Old man's soul, for his well being in the Hereafter, and for the ease and comfort of his final resting place.

The rest of the island prayed along with her.

-

Waleed and his siblings spent a long time suing and counter-suing each other for the wealth. The lawyers greedily took their cut and successively lost each case. The will was pretty clear there was no reversing it.

He quickly ran his business to the ground and spent his days loafing around his apartment in dirty boxers (at least his dad left him a place to live).

He hated everyone. But that wasn't new.

He was consumed with thoughts of Sarah, but with a restraining order out on him, there wasn't much he could do. He vowed to kill her, but he knew deep down he couldn't do bring himself to do it.

His lethargy was just too heavy.

He mumbled a lot to himself and scrached himself unnecessarily. His friends kept away from him. He was creepy, in a smelly, frightening kind of way.

He saw his children sporadically, and even his oldest son started to avoid him. They were scared of his gradual decay.

He spent the rest of his days, living on Sarah's handouts. He was first on her list of Charity cases; she didn't have the heart to let him beg on the streets. His siblings certainly wanted nothing to do with each other.

-

Sarah's sparkle gradually returned, a bit hesitant at first, and she slowly blossomed. She was still wary though, and strove to undo the damage on her children's psyche.

There were hordes of suitors after her. But she refused to jump right into someone else's arms.

Men will always be around.

There was one person that needed much healing, nurturing and some good old loving.

Sarah glowed with a confidence she had long lost touch with.

I need to take care of me first.

{The End}